Attn: Hot-Blooded Beer Drinkers

Summer in the Desert Blues
(advice from HipiGrammaSage
for ALL her adult Children)

Dearly cranky boys and girls,

I don’t mean to be judgmental
about beer consumption, but…
I’ve noticed that temperament
and attitude are directly related
to blood temperature.
Alcohol tends to heat the blood
and warm the bones, an example being,
a stiff, hot toddy on a cold winter night.
But when the ambient, triple-digit,
summer temperatures rise above
the body’s temp, the alcohol burns
more O2, evaporating water
molecules, which leads to dehydration
and brain-damage caused by oxygen
depletion, resulting in a hang-over and
a very depressed World View.
I conclude therefore, that it’s way too
hot for more than one cold beer
in the heat of the day, but a nice slushy,
fruity Sangria spritzer, at about 10PM,
would be a perfect way to celebrate survival
of another sweaty day under the HeatWave.

Bottom Line: Please drink responsibly.